to autumn

edges of autumn seap into the air
the winds bring dry rustlings of leaves
my ears listen, as my face braces
for this love so harsh, so pure

the seasons come in their march
unaware of our waves and tides
unbeknownst to the promises made
forced transitions i shed my leaves too

i anticipate these moultings like rebirths
happy to see a new life ahead
for every day new, every breath asks its due
there is after all only this one happy accident

so up i rise and on i walk
always this love, and light and laughs
transformations arrive to lead me anew
daily deeply i thank my mad precious stars

---
reena
sept 21st 2017

Perfect storm

Feel lucky every day to have so much love

This capacity to love deeply, expansively, without dilution

All this love paraded openly, without hesitation, no self-conscious embarrassment

Expressed as it bubbles without permission wildly, madly, daily

Lucky to have been raised by those that know how to love

Among others in my tribe who're known for love 

Big hearts, warm arms, ocean hearts 

Luckier still to have found such love

Love beyond blood

Love that multiplies, never divides 

Every time I catch a glimmer, a warmth, a reflection of it
Deep friendships, sisters, those that share my lens,
Or simply see me and carry me even in my shirking lows

And then to have fallen in love with you who knows love
Can't imagine a life without such a love, that gives as truly for such a love

Never tires, never slows, never trades anything lesser for love

Lucky to have met you, to have noticed how you risk all for love
Luckier still to be seen by you wholly, deeply with my faults and sins

Lucky to be here in this space and time that affords love, doesn't regret nor resent love; 

Where the strains of survival, petty dangers, animal instinct can't debase love

Here where love matters, becomes the reason and sole star to follow 

Lucky to build our altar of love, the calm and deepest of happiness to have known this, 

This feeling, this gratitude, this wild elation

This pure dumb luck of love...
Here I reign!

----

reena

4/24/17

traveling long haul from home to home evoked this deep feeling of gratitude for what i have...

fire eater

it was you that became the reason
i came out and played with fire
light and heat my customary constants
burned brighter than i could have known

but this fire was not one i ever asked for
now it was all mine to embrace inhale
i drank with abandon fooling this head
only the gallant must play here for sure

then one day it became mine to hold alone
yet i carried it further, my precious light
who could persuade me of its empty hollow?
even when burns replaced the glow

so now i know you run retreat
to your empty excuse of a shell
i'll go tread places i've always been
tending my fires like i've done before

perhaps one day i'll see the burns
seared more deeply than my bargain
maybe i'll laugh at my own audacity
of letting this skin not fear the sun

precious scars on skin will surely tell
of a story that was worth the while
in one short life i've burned and brightly
than fizzle in silent safe compromise

---
reena
3/31/17

heard this song after aeons and it got this persistent poem come pouring out
"hum tere pyaar mein saara alam kho bathay kho bathay
tum kahtay ho ke aise pyaar ko bhool jao bhool jao..."
(translation: in your love i forgot the world, and you tell me to forget this love?)

faults

some of our faults were distant strangers
even to us our critical selves
even as we looked in the mirror
we thought we knew who that was
that stared back in dim confusion
for what life left at our door
was surely not what we sought
there must be some mistake
yet again it was a fault but not ours
we built a shield so strong
smug in our self assuredness
but our body knew exhausted by pretense
we thought we knew how to love
but maybe we didn't know how to be loved
to give ourselves a firm permission
to give our hearts away, and leave doors open...

---
reena
3/24/17

Entitled

Somehow I became
One who demanded too much
But were you not mine?

---
Reena
3/12/17

restless

will you write me a poem some day?
maybe it will have the secrets i search
after all i only ask for your words
for they may somehow quench this thirst

maybe you won't be able to say
maybe it will still sing my song
maybe i already know what it claims
maybe yet somehow i'll get it all wrong

but whatever it is i promise myself
it will take me to a place i belong
it will ask all questions unasked
for a soul that searches answers unknown

perhaps you'll only write me a word or two
just tired of these persistent woes
parched souls ask for elixirs impossible
perhaps some chapters can never be closed

but write me a few words i can take with me
indulge me my wandering fantasy
only you have the words that can bring
those calming intervals for this restless soul

---
reena
3/6.17

imperfect

can't believe those days
when we wrote real letters
on paper, in ink, folded, given over to strangers
who promised to reach them, sent to fly

long desires and longings deeply pressed
into the etchings and spills of ink
sometimes indecipherable words
sometimes unthinkable notions

all forgiven in the effort of the written
for the time i found to pen the words
to tell you what you came to mean to me
to tell you details, outline, hurrying the telling

before the ink or paper or time runs out
what if our luck ran out?
what if I revealed that what was not to be
when I pondered reasons we shouldn't even be

but inexorable my writings my need to tell
to reveal every etching on my mind, my skin, my life
i wanted nothing but to tell you and have you
with the knowledge that you would have it all

can't believe how you laughed at me,
at my earnest request for you to see me as I were
at my documented list of sins, omissions and faults
my proclivities for madness, impulses, this temper

yet you laughed and i sat in surprise, stunned
how mad is this man i thought, reckless to a fault
claims he loves imperfection, just clueless
but then i fell in love again and again...


---
reena
2/28/17

2017flies

Gathering up every love and,

marching on ahead

Taking with me those that

Sing my heart's song

Leave behind what wasn't mine 

Coz few these days, so short this time

This universe's accidental spark

Became this ordinary life's light

Asking for no more than what I found, and could keep

A simple gratitude for this collection of happy rides

---

Reena

Feb 6 2017

Noisy

Chaos and clamor
Sounds of happy times
Nowhere else I'd be

find it here

The chaos and clamor of this life
Are sounds and madness of happy times
Where pandemonium reigns is where I live
And nowhere else I'd rather be

Lines I examine on my face
deep and true they run
so much laughter so much time
Yet I feel I've barely begun

One by one the days rush by
I grasp and often forget to breathe
And when I see the signs of years
The fear of death yet I won't yield

I wouldn't change a thing,
not a lucky day goes by
When I don't count such blessings
These sights, your smile

So don't come here to tell me
What lies ahead at twilight
Tales and scare stories won't
Dull this abundant heart's light


---
reena
2/17/17

Confide

Words run on wild inside my head

Bursting to confide, thoughts, demands of you

So much to tell you of what you must know

But I seem to lose my will to say

You ask your question you shake your head

Perhaps we are tired of trying so hard

I fight so much I want to lay and rest

I let you walk on, something holds me back

I know if I speak I risk so much
I know I can't keep this all inside
So while I keep these ropes bound so
Sometimes the lava must escape

I don't ask for you to understand
How could you, I didn't let it on
I don't know how I can let this be
Perhaps someday I'll have the chance to tell


---------
reena
1/11/17